The Salt
4:34 pm
Mon February 10, 2014

Sandwich Monday: Subway's Fritos Chicken Enchilada Sub

Originally published on Tue February 11, 2014 11:57 am

Whether the Subway Fritos Chicken Enchilada Sub was the result of creative inspiration or an enormous workplace Fritos spill, we'll never know. What matters is it happened, and it's only a matter of time until all foods everywhere will be available topped with Fritos.

Ian: I like that they're thinking in texture. And adding crunch with Fritos is way better than McDonald's creepy BBQ McTickle.

Miles: Yeah, but let's be honest, crunches are the last thing anyone is going to be doing after eating this sandwich.

Ian: I just feel weird about any food measured in distance. In other countries, does Subway sell metric sandwiches?

Miles: "I'll have a 5-pound 30-centimeter-long, please."

Eva: In small rural villages they sell sandwiches that are "as the crow flies"-long.

Ian: Astronomers measure really long foods in Regret Years.

Robert: The freedom to misappropriate ethnic cuisines is the reason we fought the Mexican-American War.

Miles: This is certainly more successful than Subway's Chicken Piñata sub.

Eva: I'm so proud of Jared Fogle — he was able to gain all the weight back in a matter of weeks simply by eating these three times a day! *

Ian: In an amazing synchronicity, a man barfed Fritos all over the train this morning. So I had Fritos on both my Subways today!

Ian: Now that we know that a compound used in the making of yoga mats is also used in Subway bread, eating this counts as stretching!

Eva: Yeah, I can just feel my inner chakras expanding.

Robert: I think the Frito Bandito just stole three years from the end of my life.

[The verdict: not bad. It's the kind of thing you'd create with all the random ingredients if you found yourself in a Subway restaurant with no one watching, so it's fun they made it official.]

Sandwich Monday is a satirical feature from the humorists at Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me!

* Note: Like most things in Sandwich Monday, we're just making this up.

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